no mas...

to all of my loyal readers... thank you. you have been a source of motivation and encouragement, and with out you, this grand project would have died long ago. actually, it dies now. there is a chance of future resurrection.

until then... my friends, check my facebook for updates.

Peace and love.

update

redhead is out (not my choice). We hooked up the first night we met, it was hot. Second time, we ended up back at her place, smoking pot, chatting til like 4 in the morning. I'd had her right then and there but we weren't alone, there was a friend. That was the last i saw her. She pulled the whole stop-responding bull shit. Finally got it out of her on Facebook, when she said that she just wasn't feeling it. Wtf. I never even gave it to her so how could she not be feeling it. LIGHT BULB! Maybe you're right NB, i should have given it to her!

Next: Big sis broke up with girlfriend. so i think i'll be seeing more of her. I'll let you know what happens with that. Although, she seems to have some teacher-issues. It turns out that her first ever boyfriend was her 30 year old high school teacher, who subsequently got fired. apparently, he would kiss on her and got her drunk a few times. still, pretty traumatic it was for her, cause he was a well like teacher and then got the boot.

New: she'll turn 20 next month. we hung out once. she was cool, but i didn't think much of her. I looked at her pics a little more on Facebook, and realized that she has a rockin body, so i figured i'd give her a shot. she came over on the late night tip, and i was a little faded. it was hot.

old: the german nanny, i've been giving her rides to the gym, but nothing more. she's been sick ever since she's been here, and has some blisters on her lip. and she is huge! like almost 6 foot if she would stand up straight. but dang has she got some huge knockers. can't help but staring at them in the sauna. nice shape, too, and BIG. i doubt this will develop into anything, cause, like i said, she is kinda religious, too young, innocent. OMG, i wanna do her!

and again...

new class, practicing 'necesitar'...

yup, you guessed it...

"necesito una arma!" he said.

well, shit, at least he looked it up in the dictionary, independent learner!

i shet you not

a 7th grader asked me how to say 'nachos' in Spanish

update

big sis has a girlfriend and the German is a practicing Catholic.

currently batting: Irish American red head who completely transforms into a Argentina when speaking Spanish; it's hella arious. and she's cute.

love the 19 year old au pairs

but I caught this little girl's eye in the hottub yesterday. I had noticed her before when i got in. She was chatting with some older gentlemen, a sunburnt, retired European. She got out and headed twards the pool. Wow. what a body. Tall, prolly 5'10, thick and healthy, with a trophy rack. If she hits the gym hard, tones up, and gets rid of some of that baby fat, man, she could be in Playboy, i shet u not.

Anyway, eventually, she comes back to the hottub, and i'm chillin readin' some fiction. I catch her eye and flash her a smile. I look down, look back at her, and she's smilin. We do that for about 10 minutes: she keeps lookin at me. hey, what can i say...

finally, the hottub empties so i wade over to her. Turns out, she's a 19 year old au pair from Northern Germany, with a sexy little accent ;)

I chat her up for about a half hour, give her a ride home, and she gives me her name so i can find her on facebook.

I'm not Nightmare Believer. I'm gonna take my time and savor this one, more than once.

Let it snow!

it snowed a bit on Sunday, enough to put a nice, thick coat of ice on the ground. School was canceled Mon., as well as today. Supposed to snow again tomorrow and Thurs.

Looks like Xmas break started a little early this year. See you in school Jan. 5!!! Suckers!!! =-)

big sister

She just graduated from college. Big sister stopped by to visit little sister and the school with her mom. The mom actually made the first move, started chatting me up! speaking to me in Spanish, was kinda cool. Later, I made my move for the young one when the mom was busy. Found out a little about her, apparently, like me, she too, lived in Spain. I asked her if she was on facebook... we started emailing. Finally, we went out yesterday. Now, I'm not Nightmare Believer so I don't have any hot stories to tell, yet.

But the whole thing was kinda intriguing, it all felt kinda naughty. After all, big sister was once a student at my school, before i got there. So, in a weird kinda way, i was dating one of my students, though fastforward to when she is a real woman. Was kinda crazy. idk.

Not the sharpest hammers in the shed

One kid asked me how to say 'burrito' in Spanish.

Another little girl was upset that she couldn't find 'smoothie' in her dictionary.

yup

7th grade. we're practicing the verb 'to need' or "necesitar."

This kid says, "necesito a gun!"

fecking hell.

figures

a day like anyother. tortillas, hummus and tea for breakfast. i get dressed and head down to the school to give the kiddies their lesson. As I pull into the parking lot, there is a cop standing in the middle of the driveway, blocking the entrance to the school, his squad car off to the side. He asks me, "what business do you have here?"

"Um...er...I'ma da Espanish eteacher?" i calmly respond. He asks for my ID, my school ID, which i don't have on me. He asks me to pull my car off to the side. He radios into the director of the school to confirm my identity. I look across the parking lot and see other cops, squad cars patrolling the school.

I'm kinda wondering what-in-the-sam-hell is going on!!!!! So i ask him, "hey buddy, what-in-the-sam-hell is going on?"

He responds, "it seems like someone made a threatening phone call yesterday to the school, said they were gonna come on down with an AK-47 and shoot everyone." He continues, "okay, just confirmed you're the Spanish teacher, come on in and have a nice day!"

The Music Teacher Wants Me

There was no school on Friday; we had a training instead. Hundreds of the Catholic teachers in the metro area gathered at a school for our first, officially sanctioned in-service day! There were a few hotties there, let me tell ya. I sat next to one in the church and her face lit up like a christmas tree: she was cute. To ruin my moment, then came the music teacher, butting in and blocking my cock, "cockblocking." Whatever, in the end, she will be mine, oh yes, she will be mine.

Somehow, the music teacher and I got talking about beer, and after lunch will quietly slipped away and stopped at the first bar on the main road. It took us a little while to get there and get our drinks ordered, and this didn't leave us with much time to make it back for the start of the second session, so we decided to just skip the second session all together and, instead, execute a dive bar tour.

It was great. While all the other teachers were yawning through "How to Deal with Angry Parents," we were throwing back cold ones, playing pool and music on the jukebox. Oh, and she was flirting with me, big time. She's not bad looking: I wouldn't kick her out of bed; she's just not really my type, whatever that means: She's kinda goofy and thick in the middle, but she's tall and has red hair. And she wants me, so that always improves a girls chances when trying to bag me.

We had the training itinerary with us, so we new the aproximate time that we needed to show our faces at the end of the day to give the impression that we were there the whole time. The closing prayer was planned for 2:20 so we rolled into the parking lot at 2:10. No mind that we reaked of smoke and alcohol, we strolled in, chests out, shit eating grins displayed. And you probably could've guessed what happens next.

Yes, our principal, er...um...that is the director of the school, is there, waiting for us. It seems that she was released early and is in her car, pulling out of the parking lot, going home. We wished her a good weekend and turned 180 degrees, and found a new dive bar.

I didn't fuck the music teacher. not yet.

class canceled

I've read countless acounts on Dave's about teachers who get their panties in a bundle when their class is canceled. As long as Im paid, I couldn't give a rat's ass.

Today, however, i began to feel, ever so slightly, empathy for such folks, only because it was my first class of the morning: I could have slept for another two hours; oh well, I surfed the net and was paid. :-D

Oh man!

someone triggered the fire alarm yesterday. The fire department showed up and everything, sirens blaring and all the bells and whistles.

unfortunately, this happened during lunch time and classes weren't disrupted. :-(

Stingette.

My sister has a winebar in the next town, over that way.

She's got a bun in the oven so I lent a hand pouring fermented grape and barley juice, tending to the bar, customers, chatting up the lovely ladies, single or not!

Just so happens, Hollywood set up next door in an old, vintage theatre filming their latest piece of crap. Rumour had it, Sting's eldest daughter was in the flick.

Well guess who came around to the winebar. None other than Ms. Fuschia Sumner. I had the pleasure of serving her. I knew it was her right away; you see, there aren't many Londoners running around small-town.

Get your mind out of the gutter. I only served her wine. Although I did my best at the Arabic art of seduction by eyes.

Fuschia, if you should read this, sure I'll go out with you sometime, give me a call ;-)

Please don't punch me in the Face

At that same bar, I ran into my highschool enemy.

Apparently he is a hippy now: spent a few years in Santa Cruz smoking dope.

Shockingly, he didn't want to punch me in the face, fortunately. A little disappointed, I felt silly for having actively avoided him all these years, all for nothing.

In the end, I bought him and his a buddy a beer and left him in peace. I thought it a nice gesture and I'm sure he appreciated it, much better than the knuckle sandwich i gave him last time. :-D

Gimme that, Bitch!

Last night, as the clock struck 2am, the security guard, who looked like a doberman pincher on roids, viciously ripped my ice cold Sierra Nevada Pale Ale out my hand. Apparently, in the not so grand state o Californie, the sale, purchase or consumption of an alcohol beverage at a bar is strictly prohibited between the wee hours of 2am and 6am. The feckin' bastards!

I kiss the ground

for I'm back in the land of my people, conservative bastards that they may be, they're plenty polite in most social situations. i had planned a trip to Mexico City and south of there but didn't manage to save any money for that. You see, during my investigations, research, I learned that life, adventure were not simply a matter of spending big money, lodging in resorts, visiting exotic places; nay, life, adventure, is to be found in the moment, in people, smells, tastes, views, things which are all around us and not need be paid for, neccessarily. With that in mind, I had a damn good time these past few months and it cost me a few bucks, a few buck with which a could have had a lot of damn good time in Mexico. In the end, like a novice TEFLer that I am, I'm back with the folks for summer. Being back home for the summer ain't so bad, it seems. Already, I've been 'Drinkin' with Lincoln'. Our local water-hole gives 10 drinks for $5 on Tuesday nights. Not to everbody, though. You've got to have connects'. That was plenty fun. I've also been floatin' down the river. You get yerself down to the tireshop, buy an innertube, plop it in the water, jump on it, and a down you float. Don't forget to bring an icechest full o beer, stuck in an other tube. Some old farts had a beach along the river and were throwin' bead necklaces to the ladies floatin' by, in exchange for some eye candy. Othe than that, I've been wasting away, declared vacation. In the end, I might get down to Baja.

ESPN, YOU SUCK!

ESPN loses the visual feed, not the audio, on Turkey v. Germany. Instead of going with audio only, calling the game play-by-play, ESPN went to the studio for some kind of round-table discussion. Fucking bastards. The producer should be fired, taken to the town square and have rotten tomatoes empalled about his neck and shoulders. Because of this, all of the U.S.A. missed the 3rd and 4th goals. We caught the 5th and then missed the rest of the game. In desparation, I went online, trying to find a radio station; no luck Finally, caught the ending on the house AM radio, Spanish channel. How did you cope in your neck of the woods? ESPN claimed that there was a global blackout.

dog tired

Berlitz, what can I say. Occasionally, we get these corporate clients, wives of engineers. The company pays for the lessons. The other day, I had class with a German milf. Euro 08 was on. We went to the Irish bar. I had an Irish coffee and a breakfast sandwhich and watched Germany lose to Croatia. She picked up the bill. That afternoon, I went to the Catholic school for our last class of the year. We had cookies, played some rancheras on the stereo and ran around outside All in a day's work.