Voy a echar una siesta!

This, I taught to my 7th graders. I see them right after lunch when our hearts are content. We were mechanically reviewing the previous day's lesson when I let out a bear of a yawn.

"What ever happened to naps," I inquired. "The union has failed us. In kindygarden, we had naps! but now?" "Workers of the world, we must unite and form an independent party, free from the capitalist, profit-driven, corporate elites. Only this way, shall we regain our siestas!"

Conveniently, we had been learning to form present tense sentences using 'to go,' therefore, it wasn't much of stretch to learn, "I'm going to take a nap." I spoke a bit of the siesta culture in Spain, had the students recite the phrase above and we proceeded to nap.

You see, language class is much more than simply making funny noises with your head; understanding the culture and knowing when to get some shut-eye are increasingly becoming ever important elements to succeeding in the global village.

p.s. - Hey, Linus, is "voy a echar una siesta" proper? If not, is it, at least, acceptable poetically? and what would be the proper construction?

p.p.s - Hey MC, yall nap in Brazil?

Christmas ain't no holiday!

This, I was informed of by the school secretary in the faculty room during lunch. She began to rail on about how some party or other at the school had had its title changed from "Christmas Party" to "Holiday Party" and she was upset about it.

She didn't get far - I knew a "we need to put Christ back in Christmas" was coming - as I casually inquired, "doesn't holiday mean 'holy day'?"

More than one way to school 'em!

Earlier in the year, I got in trouble for twice arriving 5 min. late. I refuse to content myself with a diet of pasta and catsup, so naturally I decided I should better arrive early. The result of this was me sitting in an empty class for 10 min. staring at the very person who denounced me as she widdle away at her computer. In an effort to get even, I began tapping my foot, zipping and unzipping my bag, clucking my tounge, all to no avail. I stepped outside to get some fresh air and the pigeon-students swarmed my position - "HOLA, HOLA!" they shouted. Holy shit, get away from me, and I've never even taught you 'hola'. STOP SAYING THAT! Know you nothing of the proper protocols for addressing and greeting your superiors!? What's this I see? A soccer ball! Salvation at last! I was lucky enough to be invited into a passing triangle with two of my 3rd graders and since then my left pass has gotten significantly better in a short amount of time.

During my break, rather than waste away in the office that has no windows, I've been heading out onto the pitch to join the students in their recess, schooling them properly.

The argue method

this is exactly what I have the kids do: argue.

It's sunny out.

No, it's not sunny out.

Yes, it's sunny out.

They have a good time screaming their heads off.

Although I'm not so sure the other teachers appreciate this.

No pissing in the sink.

This, I was reminded at the show.

I got in trouble. I got in trouble a few times. I got in trouble for pissing from one urinal to the other when I was 8 years old. It was a long urinal. It was more like a trough. I pissed from one trough to the other, long ways. I don't remember how I got caught.

Catholic school is kinda like that.

Don't piss in funny places. Just do what they tell you and you'll be alright.

Happy Hallofuckingween

The school is having a party.
My classes are canceled.
I won't be paid.
Happy Hallofuckingween!

Poop

so we're expressing what we like and don't like in class. One kid is looking for "poop" in his dictionary but can't find it. I take it from him and find "excrement." Of course, he's never heard of that word. I explain to him that it is a scientific name for poop. A well mannered, girly girl sitting in from of him decides to look for "terd," she proclaims. Another kid runs over and in his triumph shows me his dictionary and the word "crap" with its Spanish equivalent, "mierda."

am I in trouble?